


Expectant Iusti

by SophisticatedCat



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Kid!Lock, Kidlock, M/M, One Shot, Teenlock, teen!lock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-15
Updated: 2014-06-15
Packaged: 2018-02-04 19:54:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1791205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SophisticatedCat/pseuds/SophisticatedCat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Who cares what they think?"</p><p> </p><p>One of those short little sentences that Sherlock adapted as a type of religion: when Sherlock faced rejection with the neighbour kids during play-time, to the destruction of an invisible teenage social order, to when he offended a ignorant detective in a back alley of London.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Expectant Iusti

"Who cares what they think?"

  
One of those short little sentences that Mummy would sometimes let slip out that Sherlock was quick to pick up: when he faced rejection with the neighbour kids during play-time, to the destruction of an invisible teenage social order, when he offended a ignorant detective in a back alley of London.

  
"Who cares  
what they think?”

  
It all started when he was little. Not too little, very small children have a habit of being very accepting. No, he was never around children in the blind acceptance phase, Mummy allowed Mycroft and Sherlock to enter the ‘normal’ scene after the acceptance phase, during the ‘faux-superiority and fear’ stage that kicks in at about 8 years old. The adults, who were supposed to be so protective and _smart_ , just left him to his own defenses. There is no reason why a fluffy-haired young boy with such a quick-wit and pure, unabashed observation should have ever been left alone in the cruel world of primary school, yet he was. It seems odd, that such brilliance could be so impacted by the petty memories of childhood, but he was. On the outside it never bothered him. Rejection? They’re just idiots. Fear? They just can’t understand. Harassment? They’re just jealous…..His emotional side got pushed farther and farther into the shadows of his mind. Not forgotten, just stripped of power.

  
"Who cares  
what  
they think?”

  
Then Sherlock gets older. He gets taller, thinner, his features sharpen slightly into a gorgeously dramatic and tragically posh expression. He is…beautiful…gorgeous really. His voice used to crack but now has settled into a romantic baritone that strikes both fear and hormone-fueled thirst into his peers. However, in a world where we are taught that beauty makes everything, the intelligent, yet-still-emotional-when-his-guard-is-down Sherlock has an unexpected number of problems. Dull boys flirt with him only to be later turned completely off…sometimes they even throw things! When Sherlock lets his guard down long enough to flirt back, or even dare fancy someone, the rejection only hurts more. Sherlock's beauty is easily appreciated, but his fast-paced, analytical mind is more difficult to tolerate. In a world where ignorant beauty is worshiped, Sherlock has trouble truly indulging in his aesthetic. He gets called “sexy” or “fucking gorgeous little twink”, but it is insufficient. The seventeen year old pushes his physical gifts, like his emotional ones, further into the dark recesses of his mind. They’re still present, obviously, Sherlock just doesn't want to notice.

  
"Who cares  
what  
they  
think?”

  
He’s kept emotions at bay in favour of “The Work”. Hours that could have been spent with slow people, are spent in laboratories or the streets of London. Sherlock, alone and mentally armed, perfects his talents for observation and deduction. With each passing year, his mental abilities grow stronger. What was once a stranger with a dog becomes a widowed single mother raising an infant and three dogs.  
He is older now, features still sharp, cold-observation sharper still. Despite, what Sherlock perceives to be total and utter control, the balances in his heart and head start to fluctuate.  
The ‘emotions’ start to flare up when a certain, poorly tanned army doctor tells him “It’s all fine.” Sherlock can feel the poetic warmth of John’s words pump through his heart. It’s only later, much later, after months and months of unspoken vanity, that Sherlock feels the aesthetic aspect of ‘him’ warm up as well. “With your cheekbones and coat-collar.” John didn’t call him “sexy” or “fuckable”. John didn’t even blatantly express any overt interest or amazement at Sherlock’s exterior…at all. Yet, with one side-handed comment, Sherlock feels more beautiful in one second than any amount of hormonal imbalance made him feel in years of adolescence.  
Sherlock no longer feels the need to put on his cold mask for John. Parts of vulnerability slip forth. Sherlock feels human and beautiful and warm for the first time in forever. It’s not outwardly spoken; it’s not openly acknowledged between the pair. Yet, John has become Sherlock’s balance. One man, one soft, warm, beautiful man has figured Sherlock out. He didn't ‘fix’ the “sociopath”, no, John did something much better, much more selfless and righteous and whole: John accepted Sherlock..the mad, pale, beautiful, distant, emotionally-oppressed detective.

  
"I don’t care what _they_ think,

but you are not _them_.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first work for Sherlock (although I've been in the fandom since god-knows-when).  
> This is also the second fictional thing I've written in the past decade.  
> Constructive criticism is VERY appreciated!  
> Thanks  
> -SC


End file.
